The early years are often filled with hugs, snuggles, and plenty of smiles. But along with the memorable moments come the challenges. Before you start to stress over these growing pains, take a look at what you need to know about preschoolers, difficult behaviors, and the upside of this developmental stage.

Defying Direction

Is no your child's favorite word? The seemingly defiant behavior is actually a normal part of the young child's development — within reason. For many children, defying an adult's directions is a step towards independence. Chances are your typically agreeable child is simply testing limits or acting as, what they perceive as, their own independent person.

If your child is defiant at school or at home, you can:

• Talk to the teacher. Communication is a key problem-solving tool in the parent-student-teacher relationship. Ask the teacher why they feel your child acts defiantly, what situations are connected to this behavior, and what they feel will help.

• Provide choices. Your increasingly independent preschooler might feel stifled by a steady stream of restrictive rules. Offering alternatives can provide them with a sense of independence and control.

• Talk to your child. Discuss the issue — on their level. Use plenty of examples and offer guidance based on real-life experiences.

While some degree of defiance is normal, when it gets in the way of daily activities, becomes a problem for your child's peers in the classroom, or doesn't resolve over time, talk to their teacher about next steps. You may need to consult an early childhood intervention specialist or another behavioral professional for advice or recommendations.

Being Unwilling to Share

Young children can find sharing difficult. Preschoolers are still in the early stages of developing this social behavior. If your child refuses to share a favorite toy with a friend or take turns:

• Accept age-related behaviors. Children under age three don't share easily. As your child reaches three or four, expect this behavior to gradually increase. This doesn't mean your child will learn to share the moment they turn three. Instead, they'll take small steps towards mastering it.

• Provide plenty of practice. The only way to learn how to share is by engaging in the action. Provide plenty of chances for your child to interact social — at school and at home.

• Avoid forcing the behavior. Taking a cherished toy out of your child's hands and giving it to a peer isn't sharing — it's forcing. Learning how to share involves understanding the reasons behind the behavior. Forcing a share can turn the process from a positive experience to a negative one.

• Discuss the act of sharing. Instead of forcing a sharing situation, talk about it. Ask your child why they should want to share and how they would feel if a friend wouldn't share with them.

• Along with these steps, you can encourage sharing behaviors by acting as a role model. Share with your child, and let them catch you in the act of sharing. The more they see the adults in their life sharing, the more the behavior will make sense to them.

Acting Bored

If your child seems bored, inattentive, or restless, the root of the issue may stem from:

• The challenge level. How challenging are your child's daily activities? If the activities don't challenge them developmentally, they'll likely show signs of boredom.

• Not enough activity. Sitting for lengthy periods isn't exactly exciting for a young child. Your child probably needs more physical or mental activity.

• Interest level. Your preschooler is starting to develop their own interests. A child who adores art, but wants nothing to do with sports, may seem bored by a soccer game.

A bored child doesn't always equal a child who needs more adult help. If your child can't quell their own boredom, provide them with a few activity options, materials, or toys and let them create their own interesting ideas.

Is your child ready to start preschool? Contact Small World Early Learning and Development Center for more information.